jessi_jess (jessi_jess) wrote,

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Okay... just for everyone, I am SO SICK of everyone trying so hard to make me feel like shit. I'M SICK OF IT. Just stop. Everyone just stop. Don't bring my name into anything, don't mention me, just please... just whatever the horrible thing is that I've done to you just please if you can find it in your hearts just stop talking about it. If I could stop crying I'd go into detail, but I can't. And don't think my crying has to do with what anyone online said, I wouldn't give y'all the satisfaction, but I'm tired of everyone in my life friends, people I thought were friends, people who used to be friends, family, I tired of everyone trying so hard to make me feel awful. Okay? If I hurt anyone I'm sorry, not for what I did but because it hurt you. I've finally come to the point in my life that I realized I needed to do something for me because if I kept waiting it might end up being too late, I'm sorry that saving myself meant hurting others, but I won't apologize for doing something in my best intrest. I'm sure it could've been handled better, but I'm an idiot so I end up hurting people. But in my own defense, I did warn everyone a long long time ago that getting close to me would mean getting hurt. No one believed me... I guess now they do. I'm not a horrible person like some of you may now think, but I'm really not a very good friend, and I know that, I tried to convince others but I guess I had to show them. I really hate hurting people, but I did, so I guess I deserve all of this, I guess it's just karma, I know that me saying this won't have an affect on anyone, no one cares enough anymore, hardly anyone did to begin with, and now I've lost the few that did. I'm not complaining, I did do this myself, it was my choice, I just thought I knew the majority of you better. I didn't think you'd sink so low as to go to people and start throwing my name around, but I deserve that. I just want it to stop. I've stopped caring, I've moved on, now I wish everyone else would too... I just want to go on with my life and if you could just let me do that in peace it might end up lasting longer.
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